How fruitcake came to be...

Let me start out by saying that no one really makes a new fruitcake. ALL fruitcake descends from the very first fruitcake, made in the 12th Century not to eat, but to ward off evil spirits! All fruitcake DNA stems from this first "cake". A fruitcake was never, ever intended to actually BE consumed by humans. Throughout the ages, they have been as substitute ammunition for catapults, as cannonballs, and as objects dropped over castle walls to kill climbing invaders. Later, they were used as wheelchocks, building material, and doorstops. During WWII, the Manhattan project used two fruitcakes to simulate the nuclear material in the mock-ups of the first two nuclear bombs, due to their weight and density! These days, we keep giving fruitcakes to people we don't like, as "presents". Notice how they never are eaten, but passed annually as a "present" to someone else. This is why the lifespan of a modern fruitcake is estimated to be from 20 to 100 years! A Twinkie can only hope to last that long! Fruitcakes are also rodent and cockroach-proof, as they have the good sense to stay the hell AWAY from them! And, of course, who can forget the scandal that came from the 1960 Canadian Winter Olympic curling team, as they substituted a fruitcake for a curling stone by sticking a handle in one; and winning the curling competition with an unapproved stone. Some fruitcakes do indeed look, feel and taste like a curling stone!

 

Very funny. I happen to be in the minority here, and actually LIKE fruitcake. Pass all your unwanted fruitcake to me! Donations gratefully received. What I don't eat, the mobile trash compactors will be glad to dispose of.

 

Mike you're nuttier than a FRUIT CAKE.
My wife also likes fruit cakes but she falls into your bracket too. After all, she's still married to me.

 

I
LOVE FRUITCAKE>
It's kinda nice that it is used for so many other things. Truely a snack that could be carried in your car in case of emergency...mmm fruitcake.
​

 

Yes as stated above they make good wheel chocks in case the brakes go out or can be used to throw at car hijackers.

 

^^^Yup!!!^^^

 

Wow! I can't believe the stuff you learn here. I had no idea I was in the presence of people who actually ate a fruitcake. I've just never heard of anyone actually doing that.

 

So sorry Patrick80 that we are, so far, not able to agree with your disdain for fruitcake.

 

You must have no taste buds, or teeth made of granite then!

 

I have learned so much from this group. Some of it actually is important to the meaning of life.
Then again there are a lot of fruitcakes here.

 

The more fruitcake the merrier...

 

Jan 3 - Fruitcake Toss Day[FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]
Who actually eats this stuff? If you were gifted with a fruitcake this holiday season, and it’s still sitting in the wrapper in the pantry, today is the day to toss it! And why not make a game out of it? In fact, every year in Manitou Springs, Colorado, there is a Great Fruitcake Toss. Townspeople compete to see how far they can throw their uneaten fruitcakes, and some even make cars out of them to race in the Fruitcake Derby. [/FONT]

 

HA HA!
My grandmother used to make those and mom and dad actually ate it.

 

Makes you wonder........People used to eat crap like that just to polite......and today people eat crap like McDonalds for example. I"d like to go back in time to when people ate X-mas cake for no other reason than ??..being polite? Give them a Big Mac back in the day....

..... I'll bet the "must be polite and eat attitude it gets tossed in the trash pretty darn fast"..... and yet to this day people b*tch about X-mas cake......but will still eat McDonalds.......................................

 

There...fixed that little rant for ya. What exactly does a Big Mac have to do with a fruitcake???

An ellipsis is three periods, not eighteen...

And it's Christmas. NOT "xmas". Have a nice, fruitcake-free day. Eat a Big Mac. It's better for you.